UPDATED, inline below. 

When I first moved here I was amazed at all the coffee stands.  From where I sit there are 5 or 6 Starbucks within just a few miles of my house, some of them literally in the same parking lot.

But whereas Starbucks has the big name recognition and a lot of saturation, there are just as many, if not more, small no-name Espresso stands scattered around the area.  The small stands have many types of draws to help complete with the giants.  Often it is just drink specials, punch cards and catchy names.

My favorite name for a Coffee Stand is "Jitters".

But a few stands have taken the gimic ideas to the next level:  Sex.

The stories broke a few weeks ago locally and on Fox News shortly after that.

Sexpresso? Seattle-Area Coffee ‘Cowgirls’ Show Skin to Get Business

Coffee-stand owner John Cambroto could not compete against the beautiful bikini-clad women selling espresso up the road.

"We had a much better atmosphere, good coffee. Unfortunately, they ran around half-naked and we didn’t," said Cambroto, who finally threw in the towel last spring and sold his business to his rival, the operator of six Cowgirls Espresso stands in the Seattle suburbs.

The naughty baristas of Cowgirls Espresso represent a new trend in and around Seattle — perhaps the most caffeinated city in America — and illustrate how cutthroat the competition can be in the hometown of the massive Starbucks chain, which has multiple coffee shops competing on the same block.

And right there is the blame for this, if you wish to find blame at all:  The cutthroat nature of the small business.

Starbucks can have their trendy music and Starbucks cards and do fine but the little guys need the edge.  The owner of Cowgirls found one more solution, another gimic if you will.  Since most coffee stands are staffed by young girls, dress em up sexy.  What better way to stand apart?

Afterall, would anyone care about Hooters if the waitresses were not clad in tight shorts and shirts?  It would be another boring resturant/sports bar.

To answer the cynics:  No I have not gone to any of these, I have not done any field research.  Sorry, maybe next time.   None of them are remotely local to my home or my work, or in between, so it’s unlikely I would drop in on one.

And if one was local I doubt I would go out of my way to drive through for the privilage of seeing a kid my daughters age in bustier.  But there are plenty that do, even if it does trigger our shame reflex.

One recent afternoon, there was a long line of cars at the tiny, black-and-white, cow-painted Cowgirls stand in front of a Tukwila casino.

Candice Law, leaning provocatively out the drive-through window in a black bra that didn’t quite cover her shiny purple pasties, and Toni Morgan, wearing a skimpy halter top, see-through red lace panties and chaps, seemed to know every customer.

Most of the customers declined to give their names or be interviewed — "Nobody wants to admit to their wives that they’re here," Law said. One who did, a 25-year-old diesel mechanic named Mike West, said he comes every day for the coffee.

"I could care less what they wear," he said.

I have no real reason to doubt his word.  Honestly.  I hear a lot of guys buy Playboy for the stories and interviews.

Really!

More on the local front:

Some coffee stands get steamier

In a short, sheer, baby-doll negligee and coordinated pink panties, Candice Law is dressed to work at a drive-through espresso stand in Tukwila, and she is working it.

Customers pull their trucks up to the window, where Law greets each with an affectionate nickname, blows kisses, and vamps about as she steams milk for a mocha. "You want whipped cream?" she asks, a sly smile playing on her pierced lip.

The next customer rolls up, and Law throws a long leg onto the window sill, like an indie-rock ballerina at the barre.

"Do you like my leg warmers?" she asks. "Aren’t they hot?"

Ok, if accurate, yes it’s over the top.  The dressup is one thing, the flirty bit may be another.  But then again, I have seen waitresses at any number of resturants (or Starbucks) act flirty, so maybe not.

And the Cowgirls are not alone.

At Port Orchard’s Natté Latté, baristas sport hot-pink hot pants and tight white tank tops. Day-of-the-week theme outfits ranging from racy lingerie to "fetish" ensembles are the dress code at Moka Girls Espresso in Auburn and at several Cowgirls Espresso stands in the area. Bikini tops are the special at Café Lorraine on Highway 9 in Woodinville, and the women of The Sweet Spot in Shoreline pose provocatively in Playmate-style profiles on the stand’s Web site.

"In this area, we all know how to make good coffee," said Barbara Record, who opened Bikini Espresso in Renton last month. The trick is to set your business apart, she said, and sex is one sure-fire way to do that.

"It’s just, how far do you want to go?" she said.

At Best Friend Espresso in Kenmore, baristas go thigh-high. An elevated service window offers customers a nearly full-length view of pretty, young baristas — some of them high-school students — in short skirts, tank tops and high heels.

I admit that at that point the parent in me wakes up and suddenly it is not as funny.  If some 20 or 30 something woman wants to do so, who am I to argue, but teenagers, particularly under 18, well, I admit that raises my hackles.  I assume some common sense  exists here, as that would be a huge avenue of complaint.

UPDATE:  To be fair I emailed as many of the featured stands for their comments, and a representative from Cowgirls made this reply to my concerns:

I thank you for writing this article and being sensable about what we are doing. But note Cowgirls Espresso does not hire anyone in high school and only once have hired a mature 18 year old.  We do things a bit different than the stands that have followed suit. We are proffessional and are very aware where our line is.

I appreciate that reassurance.  I wish the articles I quoted from had considered addressing that question as well.  If any other stand fwishes to note that disctinctoin, I will print their comments as well.

The stands have, as expected, generated some local controversy,with businesses complaining about traffic, and even complaints of sexual misbehavior and drug use at one of the stands:

But Best Friend has made some enemies. Jeff Marshall, whose wife, Wendy, owns the gift shop Chalet Cadeau, said the couple moved their business from Kenmore to Kirkland last month in frustration over neighboring Best Friend Espresso. Marshall said the business caused traffic problems and drove customers away from the gift shop.

"It’s disgusting," he said of the stand. "It’s an undesirable business from a community that’s trying to sell itself as a family-oriented community."

Kenmore City Manager Steve Anderson said city officials looked into Marshall’s complaints.

"We’ve heard of issues and we’ve had undercover investigations, police surveillance, and it resulted in nothing," he said. Likewise, King County sheriff’s spokesman John Urquhart said the business isn’t breaking any laws.

When interviewed on the radio, one complainer (whose name I cannot recall) was pretty loud in his accusations of the girls having sex and using drugs on the premises, but as noted the police found no merit to his complaints.

It could be just sour grapes.  Maybe the guys wife is not as hot.  Hey if he can be snide, so can I.  Frankly he sounds like a guy who really wants to go, but is afraid to.

Yes, lets admit the truth.  It is exploitive.  It exploits the average guys lusty nature and love of seeing pretty girls.  Particularly pretty girls in sexy clothes acting sexy.  It works, any psychologist will fill your ears with why.

My only concerns are for teenagers in school who dress this way, and I would be concerned about stalkers in general.  Some guys see friendly and think attraction.  I hope the business owners have adequate protection for them.

But overall I have to shrug.  It doesn’t surprise me really, Sex Sells.  It sells Madonna, Britney, Anna Nicole, Playboy, MTV, TV commercials and even pro football.  Janet Jackson and her wardrobe malfunction anyone?

Cheerleaders anyone?  Look at cheer squads, regardless of High School, College, Pro Sports or whatever, and see how many are bare middrift, how many are choreographed like a Christina Aguillara concert?

I don’t here too much outrage at the Sea Hawks games over the Sea Gals.

Surprisingly this has not generated a huge boycott by local churches.  But that will only be time, I am sure.

Likewise, sooner or later some feel good politician will protect us by trying to shut them down, but until then I wish them well.  Sorry, if you were waiting for condemnation, it aint gonna happen today.

Bottom line, if you don’t like their gimic, go acoss the street to another stand, it is that easy.  No one forces you to look at the girls or to drive up.   Vote with your wallet.

These businesses are free to do as they wish as long as they do not violate any laws, and presently they have not.  I personally will continue to go to the most convenient local stand that has drive thru and accepts Debit Cards.  Starbucks here in Issaquah has always been a great stop, and like the stands above, I have often gotten to know many of the baristas on first name basis and enjoy chatting with them as I wait for my coffee.

But they can do it with their clothes on by actually being sincerely friendly, serving a good product and applying excellent customer service skills.

I’m 45 years old.  That works fine for me.

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